Yup. I'm well aware of how many crappy professionals blame the victim. Been there. My ex was a narcissist. With a clinical diagnosis. Years of therapy to sort the damage those years did. For me, not him. So I don't say any of that lightly.

At the same time, there are too many people using the word real loosely. Half of all men aren't narcissists, though the internet might make one think otherwise. Patriarchy makes for a lot of entitled control issues, too.