One thing few people talk about is the nature of the distribution. I have a female relative that physically abuses her spouse. Pushes him down the stairs, throws water in his face, throws things at him. She’s the only one I know where the violence is one way and not reciprocated.

However, there’s another scenario, and I don’t have enough fingers to count these. He hits her, or pushes her. She yells you do NOT do that to me and hits or pushes back. Because goddamn, she’s not going to be one of those abused women.

But of course, as soon as she hits or pushes back, the fight is on. And it’s two way. But of course, men tend to have more physical strength. So we know who ends up with the bruises and broken wrists and broken ear drums and all the bruises that will hide under long sleeves the next day.

I have lost count of the number of women who lived scenario #2. Lost. Count. Eventually, they leave. I just wish eventually came faster.

You done good, Rick. Thanks for writing this.

Top writer. Featured in NYT, Forbes.

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