Hold up — hold up. umair, I hope you read this. I doubt it, but I hope. I am one of your most loyal readers. I read everything you write, some of them twice. I agree with what you’re saying about nurturing vs. violence.
But no, you are a little off on this sentence that I highlighted.
Male violence is NOT patriarchy.
Patriarchy is a system run by the patriarch — men.
Matriarchy is a system run by the matriarch — women.
That is all. Literally.
Is there male violence? Yes, of course.
Are there rabbits? Are there clouds?
Yes, of course.
Are there violent women?
Yes, of course.
Male and violent are not one and the same.
Are you male? Are you violent?
Do you see?
Bill Gates, donating time and money to social justice. David Suzuki. David Attenborough. Tom Hanks. Fred Rogers. Dwayne Johnson. Keanu Reeves. Hell, Jason Momoa. Do you need me to keep going? I can.
Male violence is not patriarchy. Male violence is just male violence. America would not be in such dismal shape on a global view if a man like Tom Hanks or David Attenborough was in the white house. Not that they’d want to.
The real problem is our perception of power. We think bullies are powerful people. We think they are the one to “get the job done” — and I don’t know why we think that, when it has never been the bully that solved anything.
But please, do not perpetuate the idea that patriarchy and male violence are one and the same. They are not. Feminists have been working for over 100 years to say men can act differently.
Violence is a behavior. Behavior is a choice, not a gender.
It’s an important distinction, I think.